Should You Leave an Alcoholic Husband?
Signs of Alcoholism
Spotting the signs of alcoholism can be difficult. It is, after all, something that many people simply do not have enough experience with to be able to identify it.
Alcohol addiction can manifest as behavioural and physical changes, which negatively impact a person’s health.
If you are concerned that your husband may be struggling with alcoholism, there are ways for you to tell. Please carefully read through the following list and try to be as honest as you can.
- Does your husband regularly binge drink either at the pub or at home?
- Does your husband regularly drink to the point he becomes blackout drunk?
- Does your husband ever break the law because of alcohol, such as driving drunk?
- Does your husband prioritise alcohol over everything else, including work, leisure activities and you?
- Does your husband act more aggressively, depressed or experience mood swings when he goes too long without alcohol?
- Does your husband try to hide the amount of alcohol he uses from you?
- Does your husband ever act violently towards you when he drinks?
- Does your husband get angry if you ask about his drinking?
- Have you noticed a decline in your husband’s physical health?
- Have you noticed a decline in your husband’s mental health?
- Is your husband spending more money than he used to on alcohol?
- Is there a family history of addiction in your husband’s family?
- Does your husband continue to drink against the doctor’s recommendation to stop?
Alcoholism can seriously impact a person’s life as it can lead to the following:
- Heart disease
- Kidney failure
- Liver failure
- Trouble with the law
- Loss of driving license
- Erectile dysfunction
But it can also affect their loved ones as there is also the risk in:
- Committing acts of sexual assault
- Committing acts of domestic abuse
- Creating serious debt
- Losing their job or home
For better or for worse only goes so far. You have the right to seek help and stay safe. While alcoholism can be very difficult to deal with, there is help available for addicts if they are willing to try.
You need to do what is best for you.
Do They Show Signs of Stopping or Wanting to Stop Drinking?
Like all addictions, alcoholism doesn’t have a simple solution. There is no cure just waiting to be taken. Instead, what alcoholics can do instead is work towards long-term recovery.
This involves a commitment to a lifestyle change and sobriety, which isn’t easily done.
You must know if your husband wants to change his ways or not. A person can’t just stop drinking overnight, but there are ways that your husband can show you that he is serious about wanting to stop drinking.
First, if your husband is serious about stopping drinking, he would book in to get treatment. This treatment can be done via a private inpatient facility or an NHS ran one.
Now it is important to remember that with the NHS treatment plan, your husband may be placed on a waitlist for some time. However, if he is serious about overcoming his addiction, then he would also take advantage of the next sign he is serious.
That sign is joining a support group. Groups such as alcoholics anonymous are available across the country and are run by a team of volunteers. They are a great way to start the journey towards long-term recovery.Starting the process isn’t good enough. First, your husband has to show that he is serious about changing his ways. That involves going to every meeting and treatment session.
He has to be willing to see the process through and show a real change in destructive behaviour towards himself and you.
Consider an Intervention
An intervention can be a good way to approach the topic of addiction carefully. It can be done with family or friends to offer their support. It is important that if you decide to do this option, you also involve an intervention specialist. They are there to lead the intervention and make sure everything runs smoothly while they provide relevant information on treatment options.
Your husband’s response to the intervention can be a good way for you to know if he would be open to the idea of rehab or not. If done right, it can be a wonderful way to introduce someone that didn’t realise they were struggling with addiction to a treatment plan that can help them.
What are Enabling Behaviors, and How Do You Remain Firm?
It can be difficult to know the difference between support and enabling behaviour.
You love your husband, and you want to help him, but you have to be careful that you are not allowing your love to cloud your judgement as a problem grows worse.
Here are some enabling behaviours to be aware of:
- Making excuses for his bad behaviour, such as binge drinking or rudeness
- Giving him money to buy alcohol when he needs it
- Being his designated driver no matter the time of night
- Lying to friends and family members about what is going on with him
- Excusing his behaviour by focusing on his mental health
Putting your foot down is hard, but you have to remember that you are doing it for him.
An ultimatum and a trial separation can be a powerful way to make your stance known about how you feel about his drinking.You have to stay strong and make it clear that alcoholism is negatively affecting your marriage and something needs to change.
Seek Support from Professional Rehab Centers
Rehab centres are not just here to help addicts but also their families. They can provide you with the support and information you need to offer your husband help or leave him if you have reached your limit.
At Step 1 Recovery, we are here to help you and your husband. Your safety is our top priority, and we will do everything in our power to make this process as easy on your and your husband as possible.
Simply give us a call at 0800 012 6006.
Things may seem scary now but given time, everything will be ok. You will be ok.We are here to help you.